Unplugging

I was told that when I went to college I’d probably learn more outside of the classroom than I would sitting in a lecture hall. That moment became clear after a conversation I had with a guy I live with last night. We stayed up chatting in the lounge until morning, watching the drinkers straggle in and talking life, love, and relationships.

My friend and I talked about how much we obsess over texts and “what it means” when someone doesn’t text back right away. We discussed completely irrational situations and made-up circumstances, nights spent worrying and unnecessary drama.

Our conversation kept me up most of the night and the conclusion I came to was that I have such a love/hate relationship with social media and technology.

            Unfortunately though, I’m part of the generation who has to bridge the gap between technology and tradition.

            What happened to being straightforward about your feelings and outright telling someone that you liked them? And why does it seem foreign to call someone on the phone just to chat?

            In our world today, there are a few different ways to interpret notifications. We can assume that if a person likes our facebook posts and favorites our tweets that they may like us or perhaps dislike us so it’s actually a form of mocking or sarcasm to like and favorite. Another option is that the person is just very friendly and has similar views.

            When I was in elementary school, pen pals were common. I’m sure if I asked my seven-year-old brother today about a pen pal he’d have no clue what I was talking about.

            I also struck out on the chance of ever receiving an old-fashioned letter in the mail (yes, post offices and snail mail do still exist) from a boy. Unless a traditional man with some incredible gentleman characteristics appears in my life, I don’t think that will be happening.

            I know personally I feel confused when someone’s read receipt indicates he or she has opened my text but have yet to reply. And as a member of this generation what do I do? Social media stalk them of course. Only to make myself upset that the person has tweeted or facebook shows this person is online.

            Why the hell do I let these things bother me? Why does my mind deem it necessary to be in contact with people 24/7?

            A few months ago I went through a rough patch with a guy. I thought things were great and we meant something to each other, but turns out I was wrong. I did something completely unheard of for my generation – disconnected.

            I thought that if I took some time to get away from college and memories of him maybe I could get a better sense of what to do and how I should get over this boy. It only took a weekend trip home to my traditional, old school town to realize that our elders lived in a simpler and easier to understand time period.

            Disconnecting was easy. I let my phone die and didn’t charge it all weekend. I also didn’t log onto my computer. (If you’re reading this and over the age of 40, yes, it can be done. Your children can put down the electronics for a few hours and be human). The woods made my getaway trip that much easier to help sort things out. When I got home I went to our family’s hunting camp that doesn’t have very good cell phone reception anyway. I somehow drove my SUV up a few trails to this huge mountain where I parked and sat on my roof for hours looking at the fall scenery. Wow. It doesn’t get much easier to clear your head than that.

            My time alone with no connection to the rest of the world allowed me to think and reflect on my life. I highly recommend allowing yourself the chance to be alone. It’s such a great feeling and you feel better afterwards because it gives you time to think without being distracted.

            Now, one of my biggest deal breakers when I first start seeing a guy is his cell phone usage. If he texts a buddy or two every now and then or something about work comes up I’m completely understanding. When the phone sits on the dinner table in a restaurant or if he actually has the guts to use it while we’re on a date, NEXT. I don’t want to sound self-centered, but you’re with me for a reason, the rest of your phone contacts don’t need to be invited on our date.

            I feel bad for future generations because technology is only going to get worse. Google Glass is going to make it so people can be so in tune with technology, those around them won’t even realize people are using it. People are going to become more socially awkward and not know how to communicate in person.

            I can only hope that some will still cling to the past and realize it’s okay to unplug every now and then. It won’t kill you and it’s healthy to do so.