Tans May Fade, but the Memories Will Last Forever

            This summer was an emotional roller coaster. It was filled with some of the very best moments of my life that I’m going to happily look back on forever, as well as some of the saddest moments that will forever leave darkness in my life.

            There is no particular order to this list so bear with me as I jump around from memory to memory of the past few months.  And of course I had to include some of the best pictures, so I’m apologizing in advance for the scrapbook.

So in love with him and nervous
to meet him I literally tripped
into his arms...

            Summer “2k14" started off with a bang right when I got home from college. I had the opportunity to meet Penn State’s head wrestling coach Cael Sanderson.  A famous person, no big deal right? Well, not only is this sweetheart super cute, but he’s the best of the best. Cael had a 159-0 college record, and was the only NCAA wrestler to ever go undefeated. He was also a four-time national champion, four-time NCAA Outstanding Wrestler, and on top of all of that he was an incredible speaker and humble man. This will probably be the first and the last time I will ever brag about meeting someone from Penn State, but I made an exception for him.

       I got to get my redneck on at the Luke Bryan “That’s My Kinda Night” tour at Heinz Field back in June. It was Luke’s first stadium concert and it was incredible. I’ve seen him in concert before and honestly, I’m not a huge fan of him, but when you get to have an adventure traveling to Pittsburgh with some of your closest friends and tailgating all day, well it makes for a damn good time. This little road trip was also the first time I really got to put my new Ford F-150 to use. We had a blast. A bunch of hicktown kids navigating our way around a big city, somehow making it to the concert where we had prime parking to drop our tailgates and party, and a stadium box filled with food to dance around in all night – it doesn’t get better than that. It could’ve been the worst live music ever, but with my friends by my side it was one of the best nights of my life.  

            Concert round two was a lot different, but just as fun. After a very late start because we couldn’t find the tickets, my cousin Gabby and I made it to PNC Park for Jason Aldean’s “Burn It Down Tour.” Although we missed Tyler Farr (already saw him in Syracuse so I didn’t really care) and we heard Florida Georgia Line as we were walking across the bridge (we already saw them too), we made it in just enough time to get to our amazing floor seats and see our girl Miranda Lambert. When Jason came out to play though, so did the rain. The sky literally opened up and it poured like hell. As fireworks were going off, lightening was illuminating the sky. My wallet was soaked for the entire following week. We didn’t care though. We were still dancing around, making friends, and having a great time. A little rain sure didn’t stop us.

Still in shock it didn't cave-in
on us.

            Summer nights are about crazy adventures and lots of fun. This particular memory I can’t say much about, but those involved know what I mean and I can’t pretend it just didn’t happen. We like to refer to it as “From Fireflies to Felonies.” We went from having little kid fun catching fireflies in my backyard, to having a big kid night doing “hood rat shit.” All I can say is, I promise no one got hurt in the process.

            Another spur of the moment night was The Campout. I haven’t slept in a tent since I was a kid. One night after my best friend Emily and I ate our body weight in pancakes at Perkins, we decided that the night was still young. We had no plans so after driving for a bit we came back to my house. When we pulled in the driveway we were joking about sleeping outside. Give the two of us a stupid idea though and we’re probably going to do it. So we did. It took us an hour to find an old tent in my garage, and even longer to figure out how to pitch it. But after searching my house for all the pillows and blankets we could find, plus a life-size five-pound teddy bear, we slept in our tent. Granted, it was all of three feet off of my patio, but we stayed in it all night even though it was damn near 40^o. It’s something that we did and we know we’ll look back on laughing at our stupidity for years to come.

Jul, you suck.

 

I’m a beach babe. I could live on the beach, do nothing, and be satisfied for the rest of my life. I got the opportunity to be a beach bum for two weeks this summer and it was so relaxing. In June I ventured to Kitty Hawk with my best friend, Juli, and her family. The 10-hour car ride down was an experience in itself, but luckily the week got even better. From skim boarding to crabbing, floating on a giant raft in the ocean, losing our bikinis in giant waves, and finding sand in some odd places, it was a week I’ll never forget.

I like to think of myself as the rose
among many thorns.

First bar outing with our dads.

         Beach trip round two consisted of the annual Yahner/Varischetti Family Vacation – always a treat. This year we ended up in Punta Cana at the Hard Rock Resort and Casino and we had a blast. Since I was legal in the Dominican Republic I got to have my first bar outing with my dad. Nothing beats life advice over a few (or a lot of) brews. Countless dirty burgers were eaten and a lot of alcohol was consumed that week. But there is nothing better than donning a bikini from 9:00 am until 5:00 pm, lying in the sun or jumping in the waves all day, while always having a drink in hand. That’s just living the dream.

      I fell in love. And no, it wasn’t just a fling or summer love, we’ll prove that in the long run. A relationship can begin unexpectedly and with people you never imagined you’d end up with. And that’s what happened to Colt and me. We’ve had our ups and downs, and what couple doesn’t? But when it comes down to it, at the end of the day, we truly make each other happy. He always teases me that I never stop smiling when I’m around him, even when I’m mad, which honestly, it’s the truth and I can never stay mad at him for long anyway. I won’t get sappy because his friends will give him hell for this, but yes, I finally found a good guy who loves me for me.

            The Fourth of July, my absolute favorite holiday and the biggest party of the year for our little town. This year was one that will never be forgotten and the most fun one I’ve ever had. It always kicks off the night before with my dad’s unofficial class reunion taking place on our back porch. I love hearing about my dad’s crazy high school stories and getting blackmail to have when he yells at me for screwing up something in my life or a decision I make. Anyway, on the 4^th itself, Juli and I rose bright and early. (Actually that’s a bit of a lie because we had full intentions to run the 10k race but we just couldn’t get out of bed and to the starting line that early). Nonetheless, we had fun celebrating with the festivities around town all day until we finally met up with Emily and Gabby. The four of us shared some good times and plenty of laughs that we’ll always look back on with a smile.

           

Candid of Juli collapsing in
front of Rails to Trails the
moment we made it out.

            The Great Bike Trip is the connector between the good and bad because I still can’t decide which category it falls under. Most people who know they’re going to bike long distances train for weeks, maybe even months in advance. They’re not morons, wake up one morning, and say “Hey! It’s a beautiful day! Let’s bike 40 miles!” But that’s exactly what Juli and I did. The first 16 miles or so were great. Smooth sailing, beautiful scenery, lots of laughs. But after we realized it wasn’t going to be a walk in the park, things went downhill fast. The ride back was some of the longest miles of my life (probably because we stopped approximately every two miles to stretch, bitch, and cry). Although we did not wake up the next day with legs like Carrie Underwood, we did cross it off our bucket list.

            Some friendships you assume are going to last forever. I really thought that was the truth. I had been friends with this particular person since we were born. I can’t even begin to count all the memories we’ve shared together and time we’ve spent with one another. We’ve both changed over the years though, that’s inevitable. But sometimes change isn’t for the good. He went from being a person I could count on no matter what the circumstances were, to being someone who I no longer wanted in my life. I use to be able to call him at any time of the day and ask if we could meet up because I needed to cry and vent and he was there at a moment’s notice. Earlier this summer, even after a stupid fight we had, he promised he was going to be there for whatever I needed during one of the most difficult times of my life. Words are pointless though unless proven by actions. When I needed him most, he decided drugs were more important than our friendship and he was no longer there for me. After it happened more than once I knew I had to do the difficult thing and cut him out of my life. At first it was hard. I’d reach for the phone and remind myself I shouldn’t call him and forgive him so easily for him treating me so badly in our so called friendship. As time went on though, I realized our friendship had been fading for a while. Now it’s hard to even remember the good time we spent together because it’s clouded by the bad times.  

            The hardest thing I’ve had to deal with though was losing a member of my family in a terrible canoeing accident. Even though Britt wasn’t technically related to me, she was marrying my cousin in a month and had been dating him for eight years. Her and Jimmer were my neighbors and I’d grown to know her over the years. Those days following the accident were some of the saddest and most mentally exhausting days my family has ever had to deal with. I still miss her greatly. And when the wedding date comes I know it’s going to be such a sad day rather than the celebration it was once intended to be. Britt’s death taught me a few lessons though which I’d like to share. First, count your blessings each and every day because there is always something to be thankful for. Second, in the big picture of life, the little, insignificant problems really aren’t a big deal. During difficult times you are going to realize who your true friends are. Your family will help get you through anything. And finally, life can change in the blink of an eye so never take anyone or anything for granted.

            Through it all, the good and bad, this is a summer I will never forget. I’ve lived, I’ve learned, I’ve grown up, and I’ve had fun along the way. Now it’s back to school to see what fun times await me there!

Partners In Crime Forever

I never knew what it was like to grow up with a sister. Someone you could share clothes with and talk about boys all the time. Another girl under the same roof going through the same things you were and one who could understand your troubles. I never got to experience any of this because God gave me two little brothers who I love to death, but it just isn’t the same. Instead, I was blessed with something that much better, an unbiological sister, my best friend Juli.

            I may have moved far away and we’ve always gone to different schools and occasionally we lose touch for a small chunk of time, but as soon as we’re together again, we’re as weird and dysfunctional as ever before.

            When we have plans I count down the hours until we get to hang out. And when anything goes wrong or I’m having a bad day, she is the first person I want to call or text.

            All of my best memories involve Jul being right beside me and we have enough inside jokes that I can hardly keep track. Half of our conversations start with “remember that one time….?” Followed by something so stupid it takes us forever to actually say it because we’re laughing so hard as we’re talking.

            I’m so grateful to have my “boo thang” in my life. One of the scariest thoughts is trying to picture what life would’ve been like if I never would’ve met her.

            My parents and brothers consider her part of the family and I know I’m her mom’s third daughter which is why it’s not uncommon for Wendy to text me more than she texts Juli.

           

Jul, I just want to say thank you for always having faith in me, especially when I don’t have faith in myself. You’ve helped me face my fears and you’ve always supported my dreams, no matter how crazy.

Thank you for the laughs, the smiles, the memories, the gifts, even the tears in both good ways and bad.

            Wherever you go just know I’ll have your back, regardless of if I really want to or not because that’s what best friends are for. I’m here for you every step of the way and through everything you face in life. You deserve the world so never settle for anything less than the best.

            I don’t think my parents pay you enough for being my therapist and always there to listen to me bitch and cry.

            You’re an incredible person and I know I couldn’t live without you. We’re too good of friends to ever stay mad at each other for long.

            I can’t really find words to express just how much you mean to me. We’ve gone through so much together and there is so much yet to come. I wouldn’t trade a single moment we’ve shared for anything in the world.

            You’ll always be the fruit to my loop, ice to my cream, peanut to my butter, star to my burst, pop to my tart, and dippin to my dots. But more than any of that you’re the best to my friend. I love you to the moon and back.

Your Other Half

This past week I took my finals and finished my first semester of college. It’s hard to believe that a year ago today I still had no clue where I was even going to go to college and 364 days later I’m one semester in.

I took a humanities class at Syracuse entitled, “What is Belief?.” Yes, the title was in the form of a question and I figured it would be a blow off class I could get an easy A in to boost my GPA.

Well that was the farthest thing from the truth. I failed all three tests I took and I’m hoping the final went a little better. But what I took from that class was much more than what my letter grade will ever reflect.

On the first day of class our professor asked us the simple question of whether or not we believed in soul mates. If you believed you were to stand on one side of the room, nonbelievers were to stand on the other. The Debbie Downer that I am chose the nonbelievers side. I don’t believe, or at least have convinced myself that I don’t belief in soul mates because of one too many failed “true loves.”

Since the first day of class though, I’ve spent the entire semester thinking about whether or not I believe in soul mates. This class caused me to think about a lot of things differently than I normally would. As for the soul mates question, it was again brought up on our final and the three-sentence maximum wasn’t enough for me to accurately get across the conclusion that I came to that satisfies me.

I now do think soul mates exist, but they don’t always have to exist in a romantic way.

I think there are a few predetermined people you are destined to meet who you will just have a certain connection with. It’ll be a connection that is different from any other connection you’ve experienced before. These people will change your way of thinking and how you view other people. Relationships with soul mates are different because you understand each other perfectly. These are the people who can finish your sentences, know exactly what to order you without even asking, and could write a biography about you without even having to verify facts because they already know everything.

One of my favorite movies is Wedding Crashers, and when asked what a soul mate is, Owen Wilson’s character replies that, “It’s your soul’s recognition of its counterpoint in another.”

That could be taken romantically, and many times it is. But my conclusion is that this person or perhaps even people aren’t always going to be your significant other.

It’s your soul and body finding that person who it just connects with more than it does with others.

After thinking about this I don’t view soul mates as a romance anymore. It was always my stereotype that a soul mate was my knight in shining armor who was going to sweep me off my feet, I’d fall madly in love with, and live happily ever after.

Now I realize that my soul mate is my best friend who I can call at any hour of the night and she will stay on the phone with me for hours. Or my other friend who I text and say I’m having a bad day and she shows up with some food she knows I love and is there to make it better.  Granted, I do love these people, just not in the romantic way that it’s often assumed a person is supposed to love a “soul mate”.

A soul mate could be anyone: a friend, sibling, parent, teacher, or person you’re dating or married to. It could be just about anyone you’ve ever interacted with.

Maybe soul mate isn’t the right word for them. But it’s now my thoughts that a soul mate is someone who means a little more to you than anyone else. You could trust them with absolutely anything in this world and they feel the same about you. You would go to the ends of the earth for them and they would be willing to as well.

Not everyone has the same definition of a soul mate, that was apparent in the class on the first day when we were practically split down the middle as to who believed and who didn’t. But in my definition I believe in them. I know I have two people in my life who have always been there for me and will always be there for me. I feel the same way towards them too.

My professor probably never realized that such a simple question would have such a huge impact on my life. But that’s what college is all about right? Realizing who you are and how relationships with other people work. Coming to this conclusion doesn’t externally change my relationship with these people, but it makes me appreciate them a little bit more.  

The Rules to Get a "Yes"

            For some reason the other day I wasted 27 minutes watching a guy propose to his girlfriend on YouTube. It just so happened that today the video of the guy who proposed to his Chicago Luvabulls girlfriend was floating on my timeline so I made my friend watch it with me. She proceeded to cry about how beautiful it was that a guy would go to that extent and put in that much effort to show his love for his girlfriend by asking such a simple question. I then continued to search YouTube and watch these incredible and sometimes outrageous proposals. Why? You got me, but it made me wonder how I want a guy to pop the question to me.

            It seems a lot of my friends and people close to me have been getting engaged lately and I’m just sitting here writing this blog and keeping my fingers crossed that I’ll have someone to kiss under the mistletoe or to ring in the new year with. (But trust me, an engagement is LAST on my list right now so don’t think I’m hinting at something!)

            To top it off I saw Disney princess engagement rings on Twitter the other day and fell madly in love. In the event that I actually do meet a guy someday, will someone direct him to those rings? I would absolutely melt if he opened the little box and it was a princess ring!

            Anyway, I have rules for when a guy is ready to spend the rest of my life with me. These are “rules” that most girls would agree with, so fellas, use this as a standard checklist. And again, if I ever find a serious boyfriend someone needs to show him this list so he knows the drill.

            First, ask for my parents’ blessing. I can’t stress this enough! I will never forget the time I witnessed a guy propose to his girlfriend at Outback Steakhouse (classy, I know) and she called her parents to tell them the news. From the next booth over I could hear her parents screaming that he never asked their permission. His reply was that they didn’t return his phone call. Don’t be this idiot! Man up and make sure you get the okay.

            Second, make sure it’s a complete surprise. I don’t want to have the slightest suspicion that you’re going to ask me. But don’t make it so obvious and out of the blue that I know it’s coming. Don’t do anything that’s going to give it away and don’t drop hints.

            Third, pick a good spot and plan it well. People for the rest of our lives are going to ask two things, how we met and where we got engaged. You don’t need to go to the ends to the earth and ask on top of the Eiffel Tower or on a safari. Just make sure it’s somewhere that’s, “us”.  Maybe it could be where our first date was, or how we met, somewhere special we’ve gone? This is your job to find the absolute perfect place that captures our relationship perfectly! (hint hint, can’t go wrong with a Steelers game or over a candlelit dinner you’ve prepared – just saying!)

            Fourth, prove to me that chivalry isn’t dead. Be old-fashioned and get down on one knee (and a cheesy line about how much you love me wouldn’t hurt).

            Fifth, use my full name.

            Finally, please catch it all on camera. If you have someone video record it that would be awesome, but I want pictures. I want to see my reaction and what everything around me looks like. I never want to forget that moment so make sure there are cameras or people hidden in every corner to capture the moment.

I don’t think I’m too picky or demanding now am I?

Don’t be afraid to ask for help! If you haven’t met my best friends then chances are that it’s not time to ask me to marry you yet. They know what I love and would be more than willing to help you set it up and execute it exactly how they’d know I want it.

Now, just to find the right guy…..the time will come, eventually.