Your Other Half

This past week I took my finals and finished my first semester of college. It’s hard to believe that a year ago today I still had no clue where I was even going to go to college and 364 days later I’m one semester in.

I took a humanities class at Syracuse entitled, “What is Belief?.” Yes, the title was in the form of a question and I figured it would be a blow off class I could get an easy A in to boost my GPA.

Well that was the farthest thing from the truth. I failed all three tests I took and I’m hoping the final went a little better. But what I took from that class was much more than what my letter grade will ever reflect.

On the first day of class our professor asked us the simple question of whether or not we believed in soul mates. If you believed you were to stand on one side of the room, nonbelievers were to stand on the other. The Debbie Downer that I am chose the nonbelievers side. I don’t believe, or at least have convinced myself that I don’t belief in soul mates because of one too many failed “true loves.”

Since the first day of class though, I’ve spent the entire semester thinking about whether or not I believe in soul mates. This class caused me to think about a lot of things differently than I normally would. As for the soul mates question, it was again brought up on our final and the three-sentence maximum wasn’t enough for me to accurately get across the conclusion that I came to that satisfies me.

I now do think soul mates exist, but they don’t always have to exist in a romantic way.

I think there are a few predetermined people you are destined to meet who you will just have a certain connection with. It’ll be a connection that is different from any other connection you’ve experienced before. These people will change your way of thinking and how you view other people. Relationships with soul mates are different because you understand each other perfectly. These are the people who can finish your sentences, know exactly what to order you without even asking, and could write a biography about you without even having to verify facts because they already know everything.

One of my favorite movies is Wedding Crashers, and when asked what a soul mate is, Owen Wilson’s character replies that, “It’s your soul’s recognition of its counterpoint in another.”

That could be taken romantically, and many times it is. But my conclusion is that this person or perhaps even people aren’t always going to be your significant other.

It’s your soul and body finding that person who it just connects with more than it does with others.

After thinking about this I don’t view soul mates as a romance anymore. It was always my stereotype that a soul mate was my knight in shining armor who was going to sweep me off my feet, I’d fall madly in love with, and live happily ever after.

Now I realize that my soul mate is my best friend who I can call at any hour of the night and she will stay on the phone with me for hours. Or my other friend who I text and say I’m having a bad day and she shows up with some food she knows I love and is there to make it better.  Granted, I do love these people, just not in the romantic way that it’s often assumed a person is supposed to love a “soul mate”.

A soul mate could be anyone: a friend, sibling, parent, teacher, or person you’re dating or married to. It could be just about anyone you’ve ever interacted with.

Maybe soul mate isn’t the right word for them. But it’s now my thoughts that a soul mate is someone who means a little more to you than anyone else. You could trust them with absolutely anything in this world and they feel the same about you. You would go to the ends of the earth for them and they would be willing to as well.

Not everyone has the same definition of a soul mate, that was apparent in the class on the first day when we were practically split down the middle as to who believed and who didn’t. But in my definition I believe in them. I know I have two people in my life who have always been there for me and will always be there for me. I feel the same way towards them too.

My professor probably never realized that such a simple question would have such a huge impact on my life. But that’s what college is all about right? Realizing who you are and how relationships with other people work. Coming to this conclusion doesn’t externally change my relationship with these people, but it makes me appreciate them a little bit more.