A Letter To My Future Self

To my future self,

            I’m not really sure what to write because I don’t know what to expect 30 years down the road? I don’t even know while I’m writing if I should talk to you or say us? (Sorry the grammar Nazi in me is coming out). The year will be 2064. You’re 50 years old and I hope your kids’ friends think you’re the hot mom. (that is, if you have kids…..)

As of today, my 20-year-old self has hopes and dreams of where I want to live, who I want to marry, and what I want to do with my life. I pray all of those came true.

I hope you love who you have become. I also hope you finally got your shit together after all of these years.

            Hopefully life is everything you thought it was going to be and more.

            I realized that I’m hoping for so much for you. 30 years is a long span, and I’m sure you’ve accomplished so many things and made differences not only in your own life, but others as well.

            I know many things are going to change in the next 30 years. Did you get married? Was it your fairytale wedding, right down to walking down the aisle in your cowboy boots?

            And I’m sure if you got married you had kids. Hopefully you weren’t cursed with all girls, and if you were they were tomboys because lord knows you won’t be able to deal with girly girls. Hopefully they were like the little girl from Remember the Titans because she was just like you. Do you still remember that movie? It was always one of your favorites and you could quote it word for word.

            At this current moment you’re pursuing a bachelors degree in psychology at Syracuse University. Did you only get the single degree and graduate early? Did you double major or transfer? Did you get your masters? What about your doctorate? You toyed with both ideas but never knew if you could deal with that much schooling.

            Do you still live in Brockway? Complete with your log cabin and dream barn in your back yard? Or did you finally take the leap and move south?

            Are Joey and Johnny married too? If so, what are their wives like? Do you like them? Or were you not able to scare them off no matter how hard you tried?

            What’s your biggest accomplishment? Did you finally finish writing a book? And if so, was it published?

            The Steelers currently have six Super Bowl wins. Please tell me they’ve won a few more since then. And the Buccos…. they made the playoffs for the first time in my life last season; please tell me I witnessed them win the World Series.

            Are you still kicking ass at Fantasy Football and impressing everyone with your knowledge of sports? Or did you finally go to the dark side and learn how to curl your hair and apply makeup like a real girl?

            You still drive a truck, right? Currently you have a black F-150, hopefully your head is still on straight and you’re still driving Fords (maybe a Raptor?), but I guess a Velociraptor is acceptable too if you have a family now.

            Can you/do you still eat like a teenage boy? Or did metabolism finally kick in and you have to watch everything you eat so you don’t weigh 500 pounds? The more important question is, can you still eat more crab legs than Joey at The Royal on Wednesdays?

            Do you still hate coffee or did college and horse shows finally change that?

            Did you buy a reiner? Do you even still ride? (I pray you do because I can’t imagine you don’t).

           

            Did you and Mom finally run the Princess half marathon? I know you talked Colt into a Tough Mudder too; did he actually do it with you?

Do you still drown everything in hot sauce?

What about the restaurant and bar you always thought about opening? Did you finally do it just because? You always enjoyed working at the Rocky Grill and meeting new people, and you said one day you’d love to own your own. Or was it just too much and not in the cards?

Sorry. I just had random questions that I really wanted answers to. I’m keeping my fingers crossed your (or is it our?) personality hasn’t changed much because I’m currently very happy with the person I’ve become.

           

            I’m sure there are things you wish you could go back, relive, and possibly change. I know in my current 20 years there are plenty of things I regret. But I’ve learned many lessons from the things I’ve done and wish had turned out differently. So my biggest question of all is, are you happy? Not only with where you are in life, but the person you’ve become?

            In the past 30 years I know you’ve grown as a person and I hope it’s for the best. I hope you have been an exemplary role model for your own children (if you have any) and others. I hope whatever path you’ve chosen it’s one you love and you’ve followed your dreams and done everything you wanted to do.

            You’ve made it this far. Everything really does end up okay. Live every day with love and happiness. Realize how blessed you are and all the wonderful people in your life.

            I can't wait to finally get to be you someday and experience how far we've come in life. 

Xoxo,

~Your Current Self